Friday, July 11, 2008

Happy Slurpee Day to all and to all a Good Slurpee Day!

I think that we should take a moment of silence for the Slurpee. It changes lives...puts smiles on faces, turns bads days to good, cools down us Las Vegans from the heat, and they are tasty among many other things. So silence time...now!............................................Ok stop.
Mmm slurpee. Today, next to my birthday, is my favorite holiday. Who wouldn't love these little cups of joy? I am convinced God sent us a little piece of heaven. So in honor of us avid Slurpee go-er's i have a little something to make you giggle and appreciate the Slurpee even more. And for those of you new Slurpee comers...Better late than never. Jesus forgives you and you aren't going to hell anymore. Choose the right and bring others unto this little cup of goodness. Happy Free Slurpee Day everyone! Get a free slurpee! and enjoy!

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A SLURPEE ADDICT WHEN...
-You know what Slurpee flavours the local 7-11 currently has

• You know what the consistanies are like -- either before you arrive and/or pour from the taps
• You know the names of the Clerks that work at 7-11

• Your tongue is stained the color of your favourite Slurpee flavour
• You deliberately take your time while drawing your Slurpee from the machine and dottle before going to the till, in order to "defrost" before heading back into the cold.
• If you don't arrive at your usual 7-11 store as you usually do, they ask what happened to you the next time that you go there.

• Your reflex aims to ensure that your Slurpee remains perpendicular to the ground, without spilling, if you may slip and fall.

• You know where all local 7-11 locations are.

• Know how good or bad the consistencies are by just looking at the product, before even drawing it.

• You have a need to stop whenever you see a 7-11

• You have several Slurpee cups sitting around

• You do favors for others only because you've been promised a Slurpee reward.• When you develop withdrawl symptoms if you don't get your daily (if not hourly) "fix"
When you have pictures of Slurpees placed into your photo album, tacked to your walls, or framed, not to mention various pictures of your favorite 7-Eleven store.

• The 7-11 clerks know YOUR name.

• You never turn down an opportunity to have a Slurpee, even if you are having a migraine and have a nasty cold.

• You find yourself lecturing others on Slurpee Etiquette, the importance of constancies, and the best 7-Eleven's around town.

• Whenever somebody starts to talk about cup sizes, your initial thought is, "yellow cup or clear cup?" Your embarrasement is soothed by another Slurpee.

• When the clerk says, "you again?" Except, they aren't all too surprised.
• When your sister wakes you up in the middle of the night and asks if you want to come to the 7-Eleven with her, you only hesitation is whether or not you should wear a jacket.

• When you ask for a wad of Slurpee coupons for your Birthday and/or Christmas present

•If you had a catch phrase if would be: "Mmmm....Slurpee" "Wanna go for a Slurpee???" "I'm thirsty" (often followed by the preceeding quote) ... or would somehow include 'Slurpee' or '7-Eleven'
• When people refer to you as the "Slurpee girl" (or guy, if that applies)

• When you start your day with a Slurpee, or end it with a Slurpee

• When it's not odd for you to always be seen with a Slurpee at your side.

• You sit on the heat register because its -30C outside and not warm enough inside to keep you from shivering as you drink your Slurpee.

• When the bitterly cold winter is no reason not to have a Slurpee. In fact, it's a good thing: that way, your Slurpee won't melt on the way home.

• When the "bestest" present of all would be a life supply of Slurpees.

• When the best part of playing volleyball is getting the after-game Slurpee. A big one to celebrate your win, or a big one to cheer yourself up.

• When, in the dead of winter, you get yourself a Slurpee and a hot chocolate to balance it all out.
• When the only thing that gets you through the school/work day is knowing that you'll be able to get a Slurpee at its end.

• When, after every burp, you truthfully comment (aloud or to yourself), "Mmmm. Tastes like Slurpee..."

• When you try to grow a Slurpee tree by "planting" a Slurpee cup into the ground. [Sadly, this did not work...]

• When all your doodles contain the images of or the words, "Slurpee" and "7-Eleven."

• When you think (and believe) that Slurpee cures everything. [someone told me this only applies to myself, and that Slurpee only makes me feel better--not them. Who knew?]
• When you wait for the do-not-draw-product-when-flashing light on the machine to stop blinking just so you can have some of your favourite flavour

• When you somehow manage to always have a Slurpee in your hand.

• When you feel personally insulted when people call slushes from other stores "Slurpees." You also then make it your duty to lecture them on the differences between Slurpees and the other stuff, and how wrong it is to call any non-Slurpee a Slurpee.

• For Halloween you want to be a Slurpee

• You pretend to look at other merchandise while sipping on your delicious Slurpee and head back for more after the cup is half empty, before lining up to pay for it.

• When you figure out you can get 64oz (1.9L) of the necter of the gods (Slurpee!) by using a DoubleGulp cup.

• You get offended when you see someone drinking an Icee or a Froster

• You buy a Slurpee to comfort you in times of frustration

• Nothing discourages you from getting a Slurpee

• You fake a sore throat just so friends and family pitty you and buy you Slurpees to "soothe" your pain.

• You drive around town to 3-4 7-Elevens until you find the perfect consistency or flavor--this happens a lot in the summer on a hot day when you really need a Slurpee and you go in and its all watery........so you go to another store........and another......and another.......until your mission is complete!
• Free imitators won't do, so you go out of your way to get to the nearest 7-Eleven to get the real thing: a Slurpee!!! And it's definitely worth the drive!

• When you pull up to the 7-11 parking lot you quickly scan all the customers in the parking lot and get anxious when you see a lot of Slurpees in their hands because you know the consistency is all screwed up now.

• In your mind you consider it a heroic sacrifice to let your friends have the good Slurpee first when the consistency is in jeopardy. TRUTH!

• You get brain freeze but continue to relentlessly sip until there is nothing left.

• When the clear Slurpee cups end up replacing you're cubboard cups at home.

• You get a PHd in Slurpee-flavor mixing

• You convince two of your friends to drive you to 7-11 to get Slurpees and when you finish your Slurpee 20 minutes before they finish theirs, they end up giving you theirs because they are too lame to finish them and you can't let good Slurpee go to waste.

• Before you go out for the night, you make sure that you have the exact amount of money for a large Slurpee because you know a Slurpee-run is inevitable.

• You tutor new-comers on how to maximize their Slurpee experience with tips on applying the dome lid, opening the plastic-encapsulated straws.

• You know just how to tamp the cup on the counter to settle the product to make room for more.

• You rant at any strange 7-11 which has the audacity to NOT serve Coke (or Pepsi...it'll do in a pinch) Slurpee.

• When there machine's down, and you've been in day after day to check, they buy you a free Slurpee to apologize when they finally get back on track.

• Your dream job is to "shop" 7-11's to determine whether they are up to spec and report back to headquarters your findings

• You re-draw the "food pyramid" with Coca-Cola Slurpee replacing the "carb" section at the bottom.

• You visit eBay, Google, and every other search engine known to man in the hopes of finding an actual Slurpee machine for sale.

• Your fondest memories of childhood include being allowed in the *gasp* backroom of your local 7-11 to search for that one rare comic-book hero Slurpee cup you needed to finish your collection and the joy of finding it and handing it to the clerk to have it filled up (these were the days before self-service Slurpees)
• You consider it sacrilege when someone overfills their Slurpee cup and it spills over the side of the cup and onto the floor.
• You consider getting a 7-11 franchise just so you can make your own Slurpees (tm and all!) in full accordance with the law.

• You patiently wait for the clerk to do whatever magic is necessary to get a non-functional spout to work because, dang it, you want THAT flavor and no other.

• When there is a 7-11 5 minutes away, but you opt for the one 30 minutes away because they have more flavors

• You know you are addicted if you are too lazy to get up, and send your *other* out at 2 AM to get a slurpee!

• When the back seat of your car is full of slurpee cups just in case you stop for a slurpee and someone else is with you. Then they can use one of your cups because refills are cheaper

4 comments:

Pamela Williams said...

i love slurpees too! did you make all those reasons up yourself? dang girl...

love the pics!

Myra Bybee said...

So I have a question for you: Do you fit this slurpee addict profile?

Britni said...

lol course i didn't make them all up. However, yes, i fit a considerable amount of them. I for sure fit 95 percent about 2 years ago. I have eased up a bit though lol

Anonymous said...

you make me want to puke.